Our dumb acts continue..!!



Me- “ Hey dude, slow down the bike. We don’t wanna reach there before the bride and the bridegroom. Also the roads are wet.”

Vinod- “ This is the slowest I can go.”

Me- “ Okay. The rain is getting heavier. Stop by the side. I don’t want to go with wet clothes to a wedding reception.”

Vinod- “ No stopping. This is fun.”

A speeding car ran through a pothole and it splashed water on my right from my face to my waist. My favourite light blue shirt now had brown unpleasant circles on them.

Me- “ Okay, now it’s fun. Asshole.”

Vinod- “ You are acting like an old man since evening.”

Me- “ Have you ever heard old people’s abuses?”

Vinod – “ Oh! Enough. Shut up. I was never interested to go to this reception in the first place. It was you who told Imran- Oh yeah definitely I’ll be there and all that crap. I had told him I’ll be out of town so cant attend the reception.”

Me- “ Imran is our close friend and it’s his own brother’s wedding. When someone’s invited us, it is only kind that we attend, at least as a respect for our relationship.”

Vinod- “ Look, the old man’s talking.”

Me- “ After the talking, next comes the bashing and the abusing. So, screw it all up and ride.”

Vinod- “ He dint even send us the invitation card, man. He just called us over phone. And you talk about respect and shit.”

Me- “ Haha. Now who’s the old man?”

Anyway, we reached the hotel with me all wet and dirty. He wore a jacket and so was fine. I demanded him the jacket and wore it to cover my dirty shirt. But in a way I felt the dirty shirt was better than his silly red jacket with “No Fear” written over it. I checked out my watch to know that it was 7pm and I recollected that Imran told us to be there by 7. So, we were bang on time. Vinod entered the main entrance without waiting for me and I had to follow him. He walked as if he knew the hotel left and right. He spotted the party hall entrance and waited for me there. We both entered and a well dressed old man said- “ Please come in.” He showed us to the line of chairs and said- “ Please be seated. The bride and the bridegroom are stuck in traffic. They will be here soon.” The hall was deserted except for a few countable number of people and four photographers. For a small hall, four was too much. Maybe they wanted to see all angles of their guests.

Two of them came towards us as if they were launching an attacking on us but just took photographs of us from almost all angles. One of them came so close to me that I wanted to kick him there. I mean, I was wearing this silly jacket on a wedding reception and this guy takes photographs of me as if I’m the Brand Ambassador of ‘No-Fear’.

Vinod- “ See, he told us 7pm and the damn bride and bridegroom aren’t here yet. That stupid Imran.” He looked irritated and continued- “Hey this idiotic photographer is trying to kiss me or what. Tell him to back off.”

Me- “ Macha, enjoy.”

We passed one hour and the people who matter dint arrive yet. Our buttocks were getting sour. Meanwhile, those photographers dint know how to pass time so they took a few more photos of me and him. For a change I gave different poses and a smile. It was getting too boring. We drank three glasses of the ‘Welcome Drink’of water melon juice.

Vinod- “ Damn. I’m leaving. Call that idiotic Imran and tell him we are leaving.”

Me- “ He isn’t using his phone since last week.”

Vinod- “ Okay. Come on. Get up, lets leave.” He digged through his pocket and said-“ Wait, my phone’s ringing. Take, It’s Imran.” He passed the phone to me.

Imran- “ Where are you guys man?”

Me- “ Where are you? We are waiting in the party hall since one hour and now our buttocks are paining.”

Imran- “ Shut up. Stop kidding. I’m waiting here in the hall for you. You are not here.”

Me- “ Okay now stop joking and tell me.”

Imran- “ Hey idiot I’m waiting in the party hall. Hey wait, which party hall are you in? Are you in the ‘ground-floor’ one?”

Me- “ Yes. Of course.”

Imran- “ Come to the third floor you silly crack cases. What kind of dumb people you both are man? That’s a different function there.”

Me- “ Who the hell knew there are two party halls here. Okay wait, we’ll be there.”

We went to the correct hall, wished the couple, gave them a present and spoke to Imran.

Imran- “I just can’t believe you guys, man? Really stupid.”

Vinod- “ Yes. That is why we came here.”

Imran dint get that and I was happy for that. Next was the most important programme of the evening- eating. We ate, and ate like pigs. After two rounds of ice cream, as we were about to leave, Imran commented on the jacket- “ No Fear? It should be – No Senses.”

Vinod- “ Yes. That is why we came here.”

Imran again dint get it and I was happy once again.

27 additions to the crap:

Sunil Kosuru December 1, 2008 at 6:57 AM  

i dont see a label called fiction attached to this post
hey u know muslims hate the word pig?

Arjun December 1, 2008 at 7:50 AM  

@Sunny

hehe.. i forgot....

And about that, i have no idea.....

Cheers..!!
Arjun

siddhu December 1, 2008 at 10:17 AM  

he he....nice xperience yaar!!!!& for those three glasses of watermelon juice & the couple of photos,u shud have again come bck there & atleast wished the bride & the groom!!!!

Tara December 1, 2008 at 3:45 PM  

"Maybe they wanted to see all angles of their guests."

A LOL on that!

Wonderfully written! Was hooked on to it till the end, and the ending sentence was amazing. A well narrated experience! Enjoyed. :)

Anonymous December 1, 2008 at 7:48 PM  

wow again !! btw, i too attended my best friend's wedding this weekend and ate a bit too much i must say !!

spicymist December 1, 2008 at 9:10 PM  

awesome. those party people on the ground floor will have photos of 2 people from every angle n they dunt even knw who these people are :)) kapaal. its raining now??? or this happened earlier

Kenneth December 2, 2008 at 10:18 AM  

lol@our buttocks were getting sour...

do you hate "going to" weddings per se?, I know I do

Sushant December 2, 2008 at 12:56 PM  

Weddings are fun in India. Good to read your exp here..

Sushant

Anonymous December 3, 2008 at 9:20 AM  

Imran sounds like a fun dude

lukkydivz December 4, 2008 at 5:53 PM  

haha! i've read ur post and so leaving this comment!

poor vinod,u dint have to push him to attend the wedding even when he was disinterested :D

and i'm linking u.... coz i love ur name... i have my plans to name my kid arjun (in future that is :D)

Arjun December 4, 2008 at 8:09 PM  

@luckydivz

haha.. Sure...

In return i would name my daughter as Divya (in the future of course) ;)
Thank

Cheers..!!
Arjun

Anonymous December 6, 2008 at 4:31 PM  

man ...we people are same as you
when was reading i thought isn't this story familiar......
but a nice entry i must say...keep up with your so called'dumb acts'...
they are not so dumb infact, they happen with us even.

akd December 6, 2008 at 5:08 PM  

nice and clean blog......

I have also similar kind of experience....but I was nt photographed 4m all angels....he he he he he

u ate like pigs....only "no sense" people ate like pings...

Poshin_david December 6, 2008 at 8:14 PM  

Thanx for visiting my blog:)

I've added you in my blogroll.

btw how can I join http://swadeshi-library.blogspot.com/

I would luv to post some reviews...........

Plz. reply

Cheers,
Posh

Anonymous December 7, 2008 at 3:17 PM  

lol is this for real?

Anonymous December 7, 2008 at 3:18 PM  

blogrolled u!

Anonymous December 8, 2008 at 6:53 AM  

That was funny!!

Anonymous December 8, 2008 at 3:34 PM  

Hey thanks for visiting my blog and for your comments.
And let me get this straight.I am not really a person who shows any kind of formality.
I have got my exams and so taking the break and so I had time only to read your last post.I really liked it.
Believe me I would have followed your blog even if I had visited before you visited mine.
So just chill Arjun and enjoy!

Anonymous December 8, 2008 at 3:39 PM  

But I will be frank with you.There is one thing I didn't like about your blog....
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The skull!!
I hope its not yours:P
I am the new queen of PJs!!

Arjun December 8, 2008 at 6:07 PM  

Yes the skull is mine.....

When ppl think how I manage to be so pathetic with my posts... the skull acts as a symbol to show that I've nothing inside it.... and hence my posts....


See.. Now I qualify as the king of PJs.... i'm searching for a palace for myself now.... hehe

Sry sry sry
Thanks

Cheers..!!
Arjun

Anonymous December 9, 2008 at 10:11 AM  

Nice explanation!!!
And yes Its VTU and engg.
Thanks and All the best to you too!

CRD December 9, 2008 at 12:25 PM  

hey,

this one wasn't as funny as your previous episodes..nevertheless, you can actually start a series on a separate blog if u wanted to, and have loyal readers.

Cheers
CRD

Arjun December 9, 2008 at 12:49 PM  

Thanks...
but no buddy... No such plans.... :)

cya..

Cheers..!!
Arjun

DMulan December 9, 2008 at 2:59 PM  

hee hee.. nice little muddle up :P

Aparna (Life Takes) December 9, 2008 at 7:59 PM  

wow....
i was going thru all ur posts!
really hooked onto ur blog

Arjun December 9, 2008 at 8:22 PM  

Thank u..... ;)

Cheers..!!
Arjun

tejuvinay December 30, 2008 at 11:37 PM  

well, here I am after one busy month of asking every one whether he has an extra monitor and an extra bsnl modem.

[i]He walked as if he knew the hotel left and right. [/i]
this is genius man , just enough to explain the end and just short of guessing it :D

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